Health and Dysfunction
When one completely loves a certain aspect only then can one completely see and experience its perfection and have deep gratitude for it. This is “Loving what is” because one is able to love the symptom or illness they are experiencing. With this shift the problem has become merely the catalyst to shift one’s inner reality into a deeper level of Love. Once something is completely and unconditionally loved it is also transcended. At this point the symptom may or may not disappear spontaneously and automatically on its own but it no longer has power over the client. The former symptom has become nothing more or less than another aspect that the client deeply loves about himself or herself.
The Ego’s Defense Mechanisms
Healing through Love™ therapy works closely with the ego defense mechanisms outlined by Anna Freud and Dr. David R. Hawkins among others. These ego defense mechanisms can be addressed through consciousness-based healthcare as well as using ever deeper unconditional lovingness to melt them away with Love. These defense mechanisms served a psychological purpose but the need for them will no longer exist if one has developed to a point where one can love every aspect of oneself, others and the world. At this stage the defenses unravel and what they were holding in place is transcended also. Within a state of Unconditional Love there are minimal levels of ego defenses, especially repression, and this in turn contributes to health in all aspects of one’s being.
Healing through Love & Honesty
Honesty is a quality that in and of itself facilitates health and healing and is one component that makes the 12 step approach effective. Healing through Love™ first creates a safe environment and context within which a person can become honest with him or herself. Many aspects, behaviors and other factors that had to be pushed out of awareness (using the defense mechanisms) can now be openly and honestly acknowledged and healed. Deeper love tends to allow for deeper honesty and vice versa. Honesty is practiced in Healing through Love™ with oneself as well as the therapist during one’s session and also on a regular daily basis, utilizing forms of inventories and reviews as well as other practices to remove defense mechanisms and allow unconscious aspects to be surfaced, loved and owned.
Symptoms & Underlying Factors
Often a symptom is a reflection of subconscious as well as other, more obvious, factors. Healing through Love™ facilitates the shift within the client so they can not only love the symptom but also bring up the other factors to be completely loved as well. When this shift in relationship towards these factors occurs, the symptom loses its significance as an acceptable place holder for the actual repressed and unconscious factors. In some classical psychotherapy approaches like psychoanalysis a clients symptoms are interpreted, for example, to find past relationships or past issues that may be leading to difficulties. Healing through Love™ sees all forms of interpretation as yet another layer of projections of the mind. Healing through Love seeks instead to Love what is. While it is true that often the first appearances and symptoms are merely symbols and metaphors of deeper underlying issues, these very issues are simply addressed exactly as the initial symptoms – through loving them and embracing them in such a depth that they are transcended. Hence, Healing through Love™ understands that any form of interpretation of the client through the therapist other than complete unconditional Love with no concepts about the client are projections of the therapists mind and indicate an aspect that the therapist needs to address on his own.
Love & Habits
Another aspect of Healing through Love™ is the development of behaviors and habits that are conducive to the overall Healing through Love™ process. This may include aspects of positive psychology like developing forgiveness, kindness, compassion and other similar behaviors in daily life. It furthermore includes adjusting habits and behavior patterns that have been detrimental to the client’s happiness, well being and experience of inner Love about himself, others or the world at large.
Drawing from a variety of therapies, including behavioral approaches and current research on habit formation, a training program is developed for each client to change and transform the behavioral aspects of his life.
Dreams can be ways to access and communicate with more unconscious aspects of oneself. Similar to some forms of hypnosis, these insights can be helpful for certain individuals. While Healing through Love™ does not typically engage in dream analysis, Healing through Love™ does seek to help the client gain his or her own insights which are then incorporated in the overall session. This is simply done by a daily morning inventory that the client engages in which then is included on their returning client intake form. Healing through Love™ seeks to bring the client to a place of loving the aspects of the dream as well as its potential insights. Further, Healing through Love™ seeks to facilitate a change within the client where such a open and deep quality of Love is present within the client that the client can allow any form of dream (even at times the most gruesome or “negative” ones) to surface. These are then healed similar to anything else, by applying lovingness towards them and using the other techniques of Healing through Love™ to experience the lovability and perfection of these deeper layers of the subconscious as well as collective consciousness.
Loving and Embracing One’s Humanness
Healing through Love™ facilitates a complete deep and unconditional Love of all aspects of humanness including basic human instincts, drives and other “animalistic” tendencies. While Healing through Love™ is an absolutist approach – Love as the Absolute – it recognizes the need to come to a place of deep and complete love of self. This includes all human, bodily or instinctual functions. This does not mean that Healing through Love™ encourages the acting out on any of these instincts, but it does mean that Healing through Love™ seeks a place of complete Love towards them. In other words there is nothing “wrong” about them and, while some of them are not expressed, they are completely embraced as they are.
This approach is especially important when applied to deeper layers and instincts in the subconscious or even collective consciousness. Healing through Love™ seeks to lead a client to a place where it has become easy to allow any of these aspects to arise and be loved. With that they have lost power over the client as the client has found a way to be with them without aspects from the subconscious or collective affecting him or her. The client has become more and more independent of these pulls, desires, instincts or archetypal patterns among other things.
This is accomplished by first bringing the client to a more and more loving space within, allowing those subconscious and collective aspects to surface naturally, because for the first time they have a context to be successfully processed (i.e. loved). Secondly, other techniques like clinical hypnotherapy, automatic writing, dream analysis or consciousness-based healthcare are used to access them and bring them to conscious awareness to be completely loved and accepted. Just as much as “the goal of psychoanalysis is to bring unconscious material into the conscious” (Murdock, 2013), Healing through Love™ also seeks to bring any and all subconscious aspects to conscious awareness in order to come to a place of complete unconditional Love towards them.
Transference & Countertransference in Healing through Love
Transference in its classical terms means that a client projects a relationship from the past onto the relationship with the therapist (Murdock, 2013). Part of this process is then to re-own this form of projection and transcend it by loving the underlying unresolved problems or issues. The task of the therapist is to be this completely clean mirror; thus practitioners of Healing through Love™ are required to continuously work on themselves by applying Healing through Love™, mindfulness approaches, and consciousness-based healthcare. This is even more important to prevent countertransference. Countertransference means that the therapist has projected unresolved issues unto the relationship with the client. This becomes then the opportunity for the therapist to develop further and transcend these projections by completely re-owning them and loving them. To work with both transference and countertransference, regular inventories and reviews of the relationship are necessary for both the client and therapist. These reviews are similar to the moral inventories of the 12 step programs however they focus on describing the relationship one has with the client/therapist as well as the feelings, emotions and beliefs associated with it. Further, through practices like clinical hypnotherapy, meditation and mindfulness the subconscious aspects of these projections are triggered and pulled into conscious awareness to be worked on by loving them.
Working with the Mind and Beliefs
Healing through Love™ especially focuses on changing belief systems that prevent the experience of absolute unconditional love about a certain symptom, problem or illness. In the broader sense, Healing through Love™ also addresses all belief systems over time that are blocking the experience of unconditional love about oneself as well as the world in general.
Many techniques from cognitive therapy and especially mindfulness-based cognitive therapy are used to facilitate these shifts of belief systems. Similarly to the overall approach of Healing through Love™ however, the belief systems themselves are completely and unconditionally loved as well.
Acknowledging Self Responsibility
Healing through Love™ means to own one’s experience of life. No matter what the circumstance is in one’s life, the way one experiences these circumstances are inward processes that each client owns in the process of therapy. Once they are honestly owned, loved and taken responsibility for, a deep empowerment takes place that transforms and changes the whole being.
Looking at the Big Picture
Healing through Love™ is strongly influenced by a systemic approach to therapy. This means the acknowledgment that there is never one single cause for anything but instead a complex web of interacting factors that manifest as the client and his symptoms, problems etc. Therefore, Healing through Love™ seeks to empower the whole person by a complete and total transformation of self instead of exclusively focusing on one problem or symptom.
Once a person has transformed it will have a ripple affect that changes every aspect of their being and lives. Even more so, however, through this transformation these effects will be seen as secondary to the new inner experience of Love.